playbill vip

Jokes? Jokes!

If you find yourself needing to play the part of someone's favorite comedian--whether undercover or just for fun--here are some jokes to use to get some laughs.

Find the answers inside the playbill.

1. What do you do with a spaceman?

2. How do docks float?

3. Why did the scarecrow get an award?

4. Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

5. What do you call a fake noodle?

6. How did the dad justify buying a boat?

7. What kind of ice cream does Dracula eat?

8. What do you call one cow watching another cow?

9. What do you call a dog magician?

10. What's Orange and sounds like a parrot?

11. What do you call a quiet bumblebee?

12. Is it dangerous to swim on a full stomach?

13. What's the funniest chocolate bar?

14. Will glass coffins be a success?

15. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?

16. What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument?

17. Where do fish keep their money?

18. What happened when the scientist tried to capture some fog?

19. What’s a skeleton’s favorite snack?

20. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?

21. What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?

22. Did you hear about the frozen dessert whose wife had a baby?

23. What do you call an alligator in a vest?

24. What is ice cream’s preferred breed of dog?

25. What do you say to a llama that loves picnicking?

26. Why is green ice cream so serendipitous?

27. What do you get when two dinosaurs crash their cars?

28. How do you measure the quality of my puns?

29. How did the water introduce itself?

30. When should you avoid drinking a hot beverage?

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